Stressing that the move would help keep digital currencies liquid through the coming year, crypto…

theonion:

Stressing that the move would help keep digital currencies liquid through the coming year, crypto leaders called for an infusion of 20 million dopes Thursday to stabilize the market. “We’re calling for millions of bozos to be infused into the crypto market to stave off collapse and assure investors their money is safe,” said Circle CEO Jeremy Allaire, who along with other industry leaders stressed that a significant investment of chumps was urgently needed to lend confidence to exchanges of top currencies such as Bitcoin, Ethereum, and Tether.

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I completely flooded the back of house today and everyone failed to react like a human. The person…

pseudocyan:

c-53:

I completely flooded the back of house today and everyone failed to react like a human. The person who noticed tried to alert me by standing directly behind me, pointing at the floor, and going ‘water’. And when I turned and looked, all I could muster was ‘oh thats cool.’ Really calmly.

And then my manager darted for the mop bucket like CAN YOU TWO DO SOMETHJNG PLEASE STOP JUST WATCHING IT

literally this