Growing increasingly frustrated as he tried out different entry points on the fruit, local man Alex…

theonion:

Growing increasingly frustrated as he tried out different entry points on the fruit, local man Alex Overton struggled to pierce an orange peel with his fingernail Monday, all the while firmly under the impression that he could kill someone if he had to. “God, why won’t this dang thing come off?” said Overton, who is confident that he could take the life of another human being if circumstances ever necessitated it.

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