Whining that they were being discriminated against even though they were the “bestest sons ever in…

theonion:

Whining that they were being discriminated against even though they were the “bestest sons ever in the whole wide world,” the Trump Boys attempted Thursday to convince their father that Barron was getting unfair advantages because he was a DEI. “Daddy, Barron is ruining our lives because he’s different,” said a pouting Donald Jr., who sobbed while describing how their little brother received preferential treatment even though he couldn’t do cartwheels, play basketball, or make fart noises as good as they could. 

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Fulfilling a campaign promise made by President Donald Trump, the U.S. Department of the Interior…

theonion:

Fulfilling a campaign promise made by President Donald Trump, the U.S. Department of the Interior announced Wednesday that it was enacting a ban on unlikely animal friendships, effective immediately. “Starting today, any animal found frolicking or snuggling with an animal of another species—for example, a chimp cuddling a puppy or a magpie preening a pig—is in violation of the law and will be prosecuted accordingly,” said Interior Secretary Doug Burgum, adding that the word “unlikely” would be replaced with the more scientifically accurate descriptor “unnatural” in all government documents going forward.

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debris and detritus 2025-02-06 11:04:58

biglawbear:

meret118:

This is why I became a lawyer. Because when shit goes down, lawyers are the first to respond, the vanguard. When someone tries to do something illegal and fucked up, a lawyer will be the first one there to stand in the way.

A proposal

lazy-universes:

mostlyvalid:

Sometimes, in fandom, we just want to write id-tastic fic that rolls around in tropes that might be viewed as problematic. But we don’t want to address the problematic side of things in this particular fanwork; we just want to roll around and wallow.

It is considered courteous to give readers a heads-up via use of AO3 tags. I propose a tag that signals that a given fanwork is for rolling around, not giving a measured evaluation of anything. The MCU has carved out a space for this sort of fic with the “HYDRA Trash Party” tag, for which I commend them. Trash Party is a bit too specific to cover all of the ground I’m thinking of here, though; I propose “Dead Dove: Do Not Eat.”

For those of you not familiar with Arrested Development, Michael Bluth finds a paper bag in the freezer labeled “Dead Dove: Do Not Eat.” He opens the bag, finds a dead dove, and reacts as follows:

[gif of a white man saying “I don’t know what I expected” in a deadpan manner]

The “Dead Dove: Do Not Eat” tag would essentially be a “what it says on the tin” metatag, indicating “you see the tropes and concepts tagged here? they are going to appear in this fic. exactly as said. there will not necessarily be any subversion, authorial commentary condemning problematic aspects, or meditation on potential harm. this fic contains dead dove. if you proceed, you should expect to encounter it.”

(more at KnowYourMeme: http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/i-dont-know-what-i-expected)

WHOA WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS THE POST THAT SPAWNED DEAD DOVE DO NOT EAT

hextrudedcubes:plastic-tulips: how the FUCK did they make that penguin from wallace and gromit look…

hextrudedcubes:

plastic-tulips:

how the FUCK did they make that penguin from wallace and gromit look so evil like it’s literally just a plasticine penguin but it somehow radiates Pure Malice look at it 

image

truly character design at its finest

Part of the reason that Wallace and Gromit is so successful is that every single character is just so expressive. The people’s lips move like half a foot every frame. Gromit has basically only his eyebrows, and he has more personality than two average real people. The Moon Machine was up there with the rest of them, and it didn’t even have a face.

The penguin, on the other hand, never expressed anything at all. It’s designed almost explicitly with purpose of not expressing anything. It’s practically featureless, with only the bare minimum of detail necessary to tell you it’s a penguin.

It has a face, but it never uses it. It has no sclera, meaning it stares straight ahead at all times.

It actively repels most attempts to ascribe any emotion to it – at best, you can feel that it is coldly satisfied, perhaps detachedly frustrated. I’d say it’s like a robot wearing the skin of an animal, but that’s literally the villain of A Close Shave, and he was pretty expressive.

It’s like Aardman found a tiny crack in the likability curve, far away from the uncanny valley but a hell of a lot deeper, and decided to build a penguin there.